Gift Ideas, Product Recommendations, and Random Thoughts

Landry has a lesson at 5pm today, but I just couldn’t wait to see if Grail had retained anything from yesterday.  So I went out to ride at 9.  Two trips to the barn is so inefficient it gives me hives.  The things I could be doing with the extra 2 hours provided by combining our rides into one trip!!!!!  But I really wanted to ride my horse and not have half my attention on the kid. 
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Today was a training milestone, not for the horses, for the dogs.  Last week L and I went home to Chicago for a few routine appointments.  We brought the dogs back to Florida with us.  They are farm dogs, learning to be condo dogs.
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This post goes out to all my sisters and brothers who are riding a DJ.  Damn it looks like fun, but you are sweating every minute of it.  DJ is an absolutely lovely horse.  That does not mean I won’t say a bad thing about him.
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I love to ride, so I don’t often turn over the reins for an extended period, it is nice when circumstances create the opportunity, and I am reminded of how helpful it can be.
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Here's why I think it's well worth a financial contribution even if you can only spare the cost of one riding lesson:

As an amateur, my primary concerns are safety and fun. That means having a highly qualified instructor (yes...even after 40 years of riding) is a very high priority for me--and so many of you. I know you. I see you. We want to enjoy our horses but the quality of instruction received from a riding teacher--your trainer depends on what exposure they are able to maintain at the highest levels of this sport.

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If you have been reading my blog posts, you already know that the desire for perfection is my enemy.  I battle with self judgment.  Others battle with judgment from the sidelines.  In either case, NOT HELPFUL! 
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I have always defined the concept of self-sabotage as something people do because subconsciously, they don’t want to succeed.  I see now that I can desire success and still get in my own way.  Not asking for help is a BIG one for me.  I even wrote a blog post about it ten years ago.
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Today I feel overwhelmed.  I woke up that way.  Work, the child, horses, life.  I don’t think today is any different than yesterday, except that I have a show jump lesson today at 2:45.  Show jumping lessons give me anxiety and I start to walk down the path of self-sabotage. 
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So here I am in boot camp.  I spent many days feeling terrified about packing up my life and heading south.  I had friends who removed all the obstacles, leaving me with no excuses.  Right now, I am feeling worthy of the experiences I am having.  I’ve got my opiate, my community, my identity, and my safe space.  I think we all deserve these things.
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The sport that I was so passionate about in my 30's, disappeared from my life in my 40's.  I asked myself constantly during that time if I had lost my passion for riding and competing.   I wondered if my depression was the cause or the result.  I wondered if I would ever find another horse I enjoyed riding so much that I fell asleep thinking about riding.  
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